Equal Pay for Monkeys

Tomato Porn?

Hooters Serves Up Titty Cake To Minors

I hope everyone understands just how much it pains me to run down the fine eating and can-viewing establishment that is Hooters Restaurant... but a dumbass is a dumbass.

Now, Hooters doesn't need to take all the blame here... after all some, wonderful parent did ask this 12-year-old boy, "So where do you want to have your Birthday party? Chucky Cheese? Cosmic Bowling? Hooters?"

You really can't blame the kid for his choice.

I know, I know... Hooters is a family restaurant and never promotes the sexual exploitation of women... especially to children.

Well, someone in the kitchen... or the wait staff... or the managerial staff should have thought of that before they sent out a booby cake that said "Happy 12th Birthday" on it.

Source : http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1394454/Restaurant-served-boy-12th-birthday-cake-naked-breasts-it.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

Painted Porn O.K. For The Kids?

New York painter, Nick Weber, uses interesting subject matter for his pieces that’s causing a little controversy. Apparently, Mr. Weber had the brilliant idea to freeze-frame hard core porn scenes from movies he found on the web and paint them. Seems kinda like we’re moving backward to me, but that is beside the point.

The latest showing of his “art” happens to be in a gallery directly across the street from an elementary school; causing a big stir amongst concerned parents and a surge in greasy hand and nose-prints on the gallery’s front window.

The painting are very well done… but I just keep expecting “BUFFERING…” to pop up in the center of the picture.

Here’s more from www.artinfo.com :

The artist defended his paintings to the Herald Sun with the argument that children these days are frequently exposed "to much worse." For instance, "kids can watch people getting shot on TV," he told the Sun, explaining, "I was conflicted about how something that is bad could be beautiful." But "they are not photographs — they take about six months to paint." Parents, including LaToyia Carter, mother of a P.S. 42 first grader, aren't buying it. "I'm not ready to have this conversation with my six-year-old when he's walking to school and he sees pornographic pictures," she told CBS.

WARNING : The video shows the artist talking about his creations along with unblurred pictures of his paintings of pictures. Since porn pictures on the Internet are supposedly trash, but paintings of porn are supposedly art; I don’t know if re-posting pictures of the paintings makes them bad again or not… I’m so confused. If you're at work, you may just want to email a link to yourself and check it out later.

Orchard Windows Gallery presents: Nick Weber's Paintings from steven speliotis on Vimeo.

Source : http://www.artinfo.com/news/story/37741/porn-is-the-norm-incensed-les-parents-take-on-explicit-gallery-show-outside-an-elementary-school/

By : Stinkweed Pete

Re-Typin' the Classics...

A beautiful woman is depressed.

She’s been unlucky in love, ending up with a string of abusive, unfaithful, and inadequate men.

Fed up with her usual dating scene, she places an ad on Craig’s List.

WOMAN LOOKING FOR LOVE…
I NEED A MAN WHO WON’T BEAT ME UP, WON’T RUN OUT ON ME, AND IS A FANTASTIC LOVER.

She gets little response and begins to become genuinely concerned that there isn’t anyone in this World with whom she’s meant to be…

Just then, the doorbell chimed…

She answered the door to find a man with no arms or legs holding a bouquet of flowers between his teeth.

“Can I help you?” she said in a confused tone.

He quickly spit out the flowers and replied, “Yes, I’m here about your ad.”

“Oh, I don’t know…” she said, “How do you think you can make me happy?”

“I’m perfect”, he replied with a grin, “I don’t have any arms so I can’t beat you up and I got no legs so I won’t run out either.”

“Yes,” she agreed, “but the ad also said you have to be a great lover.”

“Just how the hell do you think I rang the doorbell, bitch?”

Bad Gnome!

Toilet Haiku

The roll was empty,

Forced to use Kleenex instead,

It felt pretty good.